Checking in Before the New Year - Reflecting on Our Accomplishments
We Checked in Mid-Year: Let's Check in Before the New Year With 5 Prompts
Hello wonderful subscribers! With all my love I want to say that I am so very sorry for, once again, having been absent over the past couple months. Between changing jobs, my pregnancy, moving, and starting back into my career in law, the past couple months have been a whirlwind of change. Please note - you will need to open this post outside of your email inbox to read it, because it is too long for the “email length”.
It has been a super exciting and positive year of change, and I am so incredibly grateful for where I am right now. Unfortunately the blog and podcast took a backseat because of so many things going on at the same time. Most of all, there was a period of over a month where I was in constant, very high stress, because I wanted to find a new job as quickly as possible and begin earning well again.
More on all this shortly, but for now, on to this week’s post. Earlier in the year, we did the mid-year check in:
Which I found very valuable and useful, and I hope you did too. Now that we reach the end of another year, we should look back (always with kindness and openness) and see how it went. This is actually a really nice practice because you are able to see what you learned, what you accomplished, what you didn’t get around to, and so much more. I used to think that this kind of thing was too “planned out”, too “serious” or too “rigid” or dogmatic. The truth is, a check-in can be as intense or as nurturing as you make it out to be.
So let’s look back on how we did this year and use the upcoming five prompts to reflect. As always, I hope you enjoy the week’s post and practice, and find it useful and inspiring. Thank you so very, very much for reading and being here.
Remembering Our Goals
One of the first things I would like you to do is to reflect on any goals you may have set yourself for the year. Bring them up, you may have a vision board or pinterest boards like I did, or you may have written them down specifically. I covered some of my own in the mid-year post above. As a reminder, here is the list of my own goals for this year 2023:
Being able to do front and middle splits
Achieve full forward fold
Have a lot more free time
Being happier in my life - change my work
Feel peaceful and calm as much as possible
Going roller blading a lot more
Really cleansing and being fully minimalist
Rushing less
Being more present
Keep healing and working through my personal things
Have a more wellness oriented home: always has been, but more strong focus now on this: yoga mat always available, comfortable, full of plants - feels like a retreat, safe, very minimal, very calming
My other goals on the board I inserted without super clear timelines, but it’s slightly more long-term ones.
I won’t bore you by going through each one, but I did manage to really get on top of each one. I achieved the middle splits and wasn’t far off the front splits - however, since being pregnant my practice has stopped for a while and I don’t think the flexibility is quite there right now. Same goes for the forward fold.
In terms of free time, being happier, rushing less, being more present, changing my work, feeling peaceful and calm as much as possible: I accomplished all of these things, but learned such an incredible amount about myself along the way.
In a way, many of these things almost became redefined for me. And the first note I want to make here, is the absolute importance of maintaining a disciplined, conscious practice.
I managed to incorporate a state of near-constant wellbeing, acceptance (not passiveness), and genuine joy and peace, by really pushing myself to grow, learn, practice, and assimilate every single day, throughout the day.
If you would have asked me one or two years ago how I felt, I would have struggled to have told you that I felt at peace, happy, or content.
My work with Thich Nhat Hanh’s practices, my journaling, my at-home yoga retreat in January, and every single experience of this year, have each really shaped me and helped me become that centred, calm, happy, and grateful person. It has been my discipline and persistence at the practices that I know are invaluable, and that are all discussed at length in various posts on this blog, that has helped me transform in many important ways.
As I shared before, we are here to do our will - our purpose. We are here to grow, evolve, and learn.
So if you had any goals similar to these, I want to let you know that if you truly dedicate yourself to yourself, your mindset, practices, and patience, you can also make leaps and bounds and in a year find yourself in this genuinely zen day-to-day mode of living.
Getting here was a journey, but as I have said before: when you look back at your life, everything makes perfect sense and it was a perfectly written story. I have so much gratitude for each and every one of the experiences that have shaped me into who I am today. Gratitude truly helps bring you that ease of life and peaceful contentment.
So let’s get on to our prompts for reflecting on this wonderful year.
Three Things I Did This Year That I am Proud Of
For me, these would be:
My dedication and discipline to assimilating learning and growth, and genuinely practicing continuously.
My decisions to change jobs and take leaps, and find my own way no matter the circumstance.
My strength and courage in deciding to keep working hard whilst I am growing a human, and my strength and courage in following my ideas and passions, and having the ability to then learn from my choices.
For the first point, as I say above, I really wanted this year to be focused on my wellness. I wanted to make a lot of changes and I wanted to feel like I really was happy, healthy, and free. I started by dedicating myself to a month-long at-home yoga program, and continued by making a series of choices that I believed were necessary to carve out a path of peace and happiness.
I have been practicing yoga for a long time of course, and was very fit and healthy - my choice to do the yoga program was not for physical health, it was to do something I would never do: follow a yoga program randomly with basic meditations and no control over what type of yoga might be planned for the day. So my purpose was to engage in a process of self-exploration, and pushing myself out of my comfort zone.
And that was exactly what that time gave me: I learned some incredibly crucial lessons about myself, my past, my behaviors, and so much more, by really sitting and dealing with each activity every single morning. The meditation, the yoga practice, and the journaling prompts. Everyday. I tried to do the journaling as rigorously and deeply as possible - I asked myself the hard questions, and I kept asking even when my conscious mind would keep saying “I don’t know, there’s nothing more to say!”
This really opened me up to being kind to myself and helped me feel like - later on in the year when I really regretted having left my job in law - it was great for my learning. So as my second and some of my third point says - I am proud that I was able to see and create so many opportunities for my learning, growth, and development. Everything was a chance for me to learn more - that’s really how I have spent this year.
I made the choice to leave my legal job because I was overwhelmed and unhappy. I felt unfulfilled and like I was working a job that held no purpose. Looking back on it, I think I do still see the “nature” of that job, so to speak, as that. Whilst I developed greatly, and had incredible experience that has now made my CV really strong, I can’t really sit here and say that property law is my true calling or what I always envisioned myself working on in the field of law.
But having taken that leap to quit - and work in tennis again as I used to - is what has now brought me around to where I always wanted to be within law. Indeed, all of our choices are a crucial part of our plan while we are here.
If I hadn’t quit, I wouldn’t have gone through this incredible journey, I wouldn’t have learned some really crucial lessons that I needed to learn about myself and my path in life, and I wouldn’t have been able to end up where I am right now - working in the field of law that has always been my dream and my passion.
The path may take many, many twists and turns. But I truly, truly believe that we are here on a path and our goals and dreams are completely achievable when we work for them. I don’t care what anyone says:
Your dreams are possible if you are willing to make them happen.
I will always tell my children that and I don’t have time for people who see the world negatively. Everything is possible if you want to work for it. Somehow, one way or another, if it is meant for you, it will work.
Three Lessons That This Year Has Taught Me and How I Have Changed
Discovering my will. One of the most important things we can do. And discovering how I can put this into practice. Two incredible, crucial life lessons. Serving others is my will. I can do this by teaching and playing tennis, and I can do this by putting my mind to great use by working in law. Law is one of the things I am meant to be doing, and it makes the best use of my mind and spirit when applied for the right cause. This is four lessons in one, but there you go!
Everything really does happen for a reason and is part of a greater plan.
I need to have a mentally stimulating environment and day to day; a measured amount of free time that works with me and for me is perfect, but too much free time is very harmful for me.
This has been - as I have already said - a huge year for my personal growth. I was never sure what exactly I was supposed to be doing. Should I be a tennis pro? Should I have my own business? How can I best use my skills and hobbies to do what I love and make a good living?
I tried the Ikigai diagrams. I was journaling. I was exploring, I was thinking, I was planning. I have spent years and years trying to figure out what my place was; where I was going to be able to use everything I was good at in the best way possible.
I’ve had my own business, I love dealing with people, I enjoy teaching, I love tennis, I’m a fantastic writer (I have published things etc), I have a very quick mind, I can process a lot of information very quickly, I have a huge passion and desire to do great in the world, to help change the world, to help others, and to make a difference in the world. I want to do something that really matters. I’m creative, I have a free spirit, and I love a stimulating yet changing day to day life; I need things that will be dynamic, interesting, and fast-paced. Anything mundane, repetitive or stale is something I cannot do.
I don’t want to work 9-5, I don’t want to work full-time, I can’t stand being dictated to or feeling like I’m not free.
How the hell can I make all of this compatible? What could possibly bring all these things together?
For the longest time I had no answer. But this year, because I took risks and made choices, I was finally able to really learn those lessons. And there’s truly no other way to learn what your will is, and how you are meant to carry it out. If you sit back and journal and diagram, you aren’t living life. You will have no idea about what works for your mind, body and spirit; you have no idea what will feel great day-to-day, and what your soul can’t stand.
Once you experience and take risks, and live different things, you then have the real experiential knowledge where you can say: ok, I have done that. I know how I feel about that.
Of course I knew that. I know you only learn by experience. But for some reason I had never really applied this concept to the area of my life where I had the greatest question mark. And really, a huge part of this was my entire life as a whole was never one where I lived a standard, follow-the-path journey. This year I was really able to carve out for myself what I wanted, how I wanted it, and have the time to take chances on pursuing different things.
I left a job that I thought I hated, and then realized not long after leaving it how much passion I had for the law. I always knew that - I knew I wanted to be a lawyer since I was about 9. But I remember some key moments whilst I was working as a tennis coach but discussing law with other people, where I felt how excited and mentally stimulated I was by the intricacies of case law and the conversation we had. It was really eye-opening, in fact, to see just how passionate I felt about it. It was like - I always knew I loved it, but I never really grasped just how fun and exciting I also found it. I genuinely love the law.
I’m riveted when I’m drafting contracts, or reading case law, or learning about case law, or reading tons of details to find solutions, or attending court, or preparing for trial, or cases….I could go on and on.
I never would have learned all of these important lessons if I hadn’t taken the jump and left my job in law to begin with. Everything I am good at has come together in this perfect, dream job role I currently hold at my firm. I am so incredibly grateful and thankful to have this job and work with them on the team.
Everything really does happen for a reason. And being able to have been gifted this incredible journey this year of very important, and special self-development and growth is one of the biggest gifts I will keep with me. This year has answered my long-time, huge, and hugely important, life questions.
I feel incredibly blessed, grateful, and happy for this. For my growth, learning, and life.
Three Things I am Grateful For
Which brings us right into our third prompt!
My growth, development, and learning - I am grateful for the chances and risks I took, for the choices I made, and the incredible growth and learning that has come from this.
My family
My family’s health, happiness, and prosperity
Growing a baby boy, being able to at least speak and facetime my mom, dad, and brother, having an incredible partner who is a genuine superman, and being blessed with our beautiful life and day-to-day is an utterly precious reality. I am beyond grateful and feel so blessed for our life. I am so thankful, and I always aim to practice this gratitude every single day.
How Well Did I Take Care of Myself This Year Mentally, Physically, and Emotionally
This is a really important one for you to evaluate. You can see from the work I did this year, the goals I had, and everything I have explained so far, how much my wellbeing was at the forefront of the journey for the year.
How do you feel like you fared? Did you have any wellbeing goals? Did you have anything in mind regarding being kinder to yourself perhaps? More patient? Maybe making more time to know what feels right for your mind and body, and what doesn’t?
And if you do feel like you know some of the things that are right and wrong for you, do you feel like you were able to act on it? If you did act on it, what more could you do? Remember to feel happy and proud of whatever work you put in. Don’t be overly critical. Just be honest and think if there was something you really could have done better, or did you really just do the best you could with the time/options/knowledge you had at the time.
If you didn’t act on any of the things you wanted to change, or work toward in order to improve your mind, body and emotions, then how are you planning on changing that and doing better?
Will you set any new goals for this new coming year? How are you going to map them out so that you feel engaged and motivated to keep sticking with it throughout the varying seasons and months?
Remember that it’s ok to change and have new feelings and ideas. Go with your changes and how you feel, go with the seasons; just keep any important goals in mind and consider what and how you want to feel or achieve, and what you can be doing to make that happen.
If I Could Give My Future Self Advice for the Coming Year, What Would it Be?
For me, this would be to keep trusting the process, and keep using your will. Keep working with the universe to manifest your reality and have what you want; keep faith that it will show you the way in the best way that is meant for you, in the only way it can for you to walk the steps you need to in order to be ready; ready for the next step, ready to get what you are asking for, and ready for each part of your life.
Keep working towards your dreams and your goals because it is never too late.
Keep trusting in yourself and have faith in your power, strength, and courage. Keep your heart open and your mind open, keep your love going, your trust, your faith, and your work toward your goals.
Everything you want really is possible, and even the things you didn’t know you loved or wanted can be shown to you by the universe working its magic.
In the wise words of Mo Salah, never give up. Against all odds, when you feel in despair, when you think how can it work, when you don’t know how it can get better, when you feel completely lost, or out of options, or like giving up. JUST REMEMBER: