Holistic Minimalism and Intentional Living
Removing our TV, Tips for More Intentional Living and Your Practice of the Week
Hello and welcome to this week’s post! This post is too long to be viewed in your email so please click “open in browser” :) This week we talk about what intentional living is, how you can do more of it, how to apply minimalism holistically (ie, it’s not just about throwing things out!), and the choice we made to remove our TV. I have created what I hope will be inspiration for you to have a run-through of where you are currently at. How in line do you currently live with your values? Do you know what you value, and do you prioritise it in your life?
Before I delve into these questions, you can read about how we apply minimalism holistically - not just to our home - but to our entire lives. Finances, holidays, food shops…
The reality is that I disagree with today’s world: everyone tells you “more is more” and endless options equates to abundance. My position is the more restrictions, the more free and abundant you really are. Sounds like a conundrum - but read on and tell me what you think! So let’s get started :)
The Pursuit of Happiness: How Minimalism and Intentional Living Gives You Freedom
We all want to be as happy as the doggo in that picture; check in with yourself: when was the last time you really felt like you were happy and having fun? Do you feel like that often, daily, or regularly? O is it only once in a while?
A lot of people feel burdened, burned-out, or worn out by life. If you search the internet for things like “slow living” “minimalism” “quiet life” and so on, you will see thousands of videos of people telling you they experienced complete burn-out, and how making lifestyle changes in line with minimalism and slow living gave their life a total turn around.
So many people feel worn out or burdened by their jobs, life, and responsibilities. But here’s something important for you to remember when you hear people speak about their burn out:
The danger is that a lot of the people who speak about making lifestyle changes, advocate - or highlight - quitting their job. They place most of the emphasis on this one part of their life, and it appears to the viewer that making this change will give you the freedom you need. They explain how their corporate job was holding them back from being able to do what they loved.
While it is very true that many people feel trapped in corporate jobs, or work in “meaningless” careers or roles that aren’t their calling or passion, it’s very important to highlight that simply changing your job won’t bring you what you need. It’s a great place to start if you work very long hours, don’t feel fulfilled, or feel like you are on a constant treadmill/rat race.
But all of that simply feeds into the bigger picture: what aspects of your life are intentional?
How much of what you do, do you choose? How much are you settling for?
The more choices in your life that you actually make, the more intentional your life becomes.
This is what intentional living is.
So naturally, yes, the choices you make around your job are of course hugely important - especially if your job makes up a large part of your life, as is the case for most people. Even if you are a successful pro-footballer, the truth is that your job will still take up a huge part of your life - so really, this concept applies to everyone, no matter your status in life.
But intentional living and being a minimalist “holistically” is about so much more than just your work. As stated, this can be/is a huge part of it.
But just like decluttering won’t automatically make you a minimalist or give you an intentional life from one day to the next, I want to highlight that even a huge life change like switching job roles will also fall short of the mark.
The point here is to remember that every step you take, big or small, where you make a conscious decision to choose, and you base that on what you value and what you know works for you, is a step on your intentional living / minimalist path. This is a really key point that I think is completely lost in the huge amount of chatter that you find online on these topics.
So read those questions again: How much of what you do, do you choose? How much are you settling for?
I strongly recommend taking the time here to write these things down. Make a list of whatever you are thinking of as you read this, and what comes to mind. Think about how you feel - on your positive choices and any lack of choices.
We usually always have choices. The more you make, the freer you are. To remain intentional, free, and holistically a minimalist, you need to make these choices almost daily.
Contrary to what a lot of “intentional living” information says, it isn’t about continuously asking yourself if what you are doing right now is the best use of your time. This is rigid, dogmatic, and completely feeding into the rat race/hustle mentality. It isn’t about always looking to level up or what you can do next.
Living with intention is about living mindfully, in a way where you recognize your values and you then intentionally make choices to be in alignment with whatever they may be.
It’s about having that ability to check in with yourself and see how much of your life is habit, routine, conditioning, or “thoughtlessness” - and how much of it is comprised of moments where you actively decide what happens.
Check In With Yourself and What Matters - Holistic Minimalism
Take a moment. Here is the practice of the week - use this exercise and answer:
How in line do you currently live with your values?
Do you know what you value?
Do you prioritise it in your life?
Do you actively make choices, daily, weekly and monthly, to prioritise those values?
If you do, make a list of the choices and decisions you have made lately: a few daily ones - whether constant or one-off, weekly, and monthly.
These questions will help you live and maintain a more holistic, intentional, and mindful life. You never just want to be going through the motions. You can do so much more, and you deserve to. Don’t let people, society, or anyone say that something can’t be done. I truly believe that people can pretty much accomplish whatever they want to, if they really apply themselves and put their mind to it.
So surely, if one of your concerns is being short of downtime, for example, this is no insurmountable task. Do not tell yourself that you have “too much” going on and can’t slow down, or can’t make time. Of course you can slow down. You have all the power and you can make the choices you need to. Think hard about what you can decide to do less of, or stop doing, and make time for the things that matter to you most.
The reality is that in many cases, it’s much easier for people to believe the stories they tell themselves. It’s easier to do that, than take a chance, bet on themselves, be brave, and make a change.
Change isn’t easy, and if you are used to doing things a certain way, it can be scary. But sometimes, you just can’t keep making excuses. I’ve seen people complain that they can’t go on a date with their partner or have time together because they are just “too busy” with kids and work. If you can’t prioritise your family, or love, then something is wrong.
Whilst it’s perfectly true that people can be very busy, it’s all about making time for what you want. Again - intentional living gives you control back over your life, rather than feeling like you have no say in anything and no power to make a change.
Equally as important is to create the right circle for yourself and be surrounded by doers - not complainers and excuse-makers. This isn’t meant to sound unsympathetic to anyone who may truly be unable to make a change - but the saying “where there’s a will, there’s a way” is a saying for a reason!
So once you have written your answers to thsoe questions, take the time you need to see what you can change, how, when, and write down what you will use the extra time for. Remember, that could just be sitting down in the quiet - intentional living is about - say it with me! - making sure you are actively making choices to spend time in the way you want to and doing what you value.
How We Have Applied Intentional Living a Little Step Further: Removing Our TV
As with every post, I share the exercise of the week and a few personal reflections on how we are working on something.
Most recently, the change we have made was to make the decision to remove the TV from the living room.
For years, we haven’t watched TV - as in “live TV”. To be clear, we don’t have a clue of the news, the latest shows, commercials - we simply do not watch television and we are very against it. We have a television to use only streaming services (Netflix, Freevee, Youtube, and Disney) and we strongly vet any shows we do watch: Do they have conditioning, are they negative, low-consciousness, what agenda are they pushing…
So, this of course means we only watch very few, select shows on these services as it is. Aside from shows we vet/ok, or old Disney cartoons and movies (Snow White etc), we avoid pretty much 90% of the things on these streaming services. So we already create very strong boundaries. The TV was never constantly on, or with loads of garbage just playing.
Lastly, we also used the TV so we can play video games and watch DVDs.
During the day, the TV is off. I use it on my lunch break only. If it is ever on outside of my lunch break it’s usually for peaceful youtube videos (like “energy cleansing 432hz” videos). This is rare though. This meant we really only watched TV together for a few hours max in the evening.
Now, a while back, I saw explanations by a few slow living/intentional/minimalist lifestyle people, who said they didn’t have a TV. They would say, “if we want to watch something, we use the laptop”. I thought their space looked nice and clear without it, but I also thought:
That’s a bit extreme. Not having a TV? Seeing how controlled and measured we are with ours, I didn’t really see what difference it could make to physically remove it from the space. If you just control how you use it, like we do, then what’s the difference?
Besides, if you’re going to keep watching things on a laptop anyway, then that’s stupid isn’t it? You’re still using a device, you’re still watching a screen - a TV - you’re just not using a large screen. But you’re still using a little screen to do the same thing.
I thought it was really silly. And I still do.
So for us, when we spoke about making this choice, it wasn’t about “yeah we have the laptop so we can use that instead”.
I spoke to my partner about how I tried to find something to watch on Netflix - or Disney, or Freevee, or anything - over my lunch break and I really struggled to find something I genuinely wanted to watch. I didn’t want to just put on the same old shows.
I wanted something positive, light hearted, interesting, a bit informative, different. I couldn’t find a single thing that fit these requirements.
Even things which appear positive on the surface - like say, Marie Kondo - actually still play very much into something negative. They can make people feel “less-than”. You can think you aren’t as organized, as tidy, as together. People feel a pressure or a stress about how there is something they need to fix, do better, or change. It seems like a positive show on the surface, and it can be, if you take what you need only (such as tips for folding things), but otherwise it’s very much the social media comparison-effect.
Then you have shows which are meant to be informational. But they are riddled with quite negative and sad stories. For the sake of surface-level information, you are subjecting yourself to quite uninteresting and negative themes, visuals, and audio.
So it really made me start thinking about what I was doing, and why. And while yes, I highly rate and recommend What the Health and the Gamechangers, two shows out of thousands aren’t great standards or value enough to pay 10.99 per service.
Again, once intentional living becomes a natural part of how you approach your every-day, these questions come naturally.
I thought, why am I trying to force myself to see something on these streaming services, when there’s nothing I really enjoy? In fact, why do we even still have them if we don’t really use them for more than a couple shows? Why not just buy the box sets?
In line with continuing our low-spend year - and again - our intentional living approach to our finances and “holistic” minimalism - I spoke to my partner about the true value of TV, and these services.
Thankfully, we are both always very in tune and he had been considering these things himself, without us having spoken about it yet.
So we spoke about it over the course of a day and made the decision that same night. We took the TV down the next day (as our closets are pretty empty it just fit into my closet easily), and the cables, console remotes etc all fit tidily into one IKEA shoe box, which we have quite a few leftover from having cleared out shoes previously.
So What Has Changed by Removing Our TV? We Already Barely Used it, What Difference Could it Have Made?
Well, surprisingly, it has made a big difference.
For one, I noticed how much of a habit the TV was for me. I would put it on during my lunch break even though I was telling myself I didn’t really want to watch any of the things I was watching. That’s a habit. Why switch it on if I didn’t really want to watch anything?
My reasons were the following:
Don’t be uber-monk, you can’t just sit in silence all the time. Put some TV on and relax during your break
Am I weird for just wanting to sit in silence? Is that wrong?
I felt a pressure to use it because it was there. Because we are paying for the services. Shouldn’t I be using them, whether I want to or not? - one of the weirdest realizations!
Try and be less idealistic and just have some non-judgmental fun and watch these shows without always seeing the negative in them.
So even though I was a very conscious, mindful user of this device, I still had a habit of switching the thing on, for really no good reason! I didn’t particularly love or enjoy what I was watching, but I would think “well, I’ll just put it on.” What else am I going to do, sit in silence? That’s weird isn’t it?
Well in short, these are all the changes that even people like us - people who are very regimented already with their TV use - have seen:
While my partner cooked, I would just have the TV on and be separate from him. Never loved it, but just thought it was good for me or ok to relax. Now I sit at the breakfast bar and we chat while he cooks. Or, I do my own thing on the couch: write, read, draw…
I’m doing a lot more art. I think this is because I have reframed the space as a creative area to hang out in, and without the big black box there, it just feels more light and free and creative.
I always hated having to arrange the house around this silly black box. I want the couch to face out the window. I want the living room to be a place that feels creative and fun. I want the living room to be a place where we can play games, have conversations, connect, and just hang out.
I never liked the living room being centred around a TV. I’ve spent years being unhappy with the setups because I didn’t think we could just…do it differently. Nuts! Even though my own mom never had a TV in the living room!
I have always wanted to “find a place” for all my art stuff - have my easel out, have my paints readily accessible. I would always hide all this away! Why!? If my partner were to ever put any of his guitars or musical things away I would be so angry at him. In fact, I am always asking him to have more of his guitars out and making sure he has everything set up so he can use whatever he wants to comfortably!
Yet here I was, hiding my own tiny bit of stuff - an easel and a wicker box of art materials for God’s sake! - what’s that compared to 10 guitars! And I was placing my two things in uncomfortable places because I just couldn’t think to put it here in the living room!
I think the “permission” to re-frame this space as a living area! - and not a TV box area - is what has really changed my whole approach. It has given me all this freedom to just finally do me. We both just relax and hang out here now. We talk all the time on the couch, even more than before.
We read more. We even just sit in quiet more. I rest more - I allow myself to switch off and even sleep during my downtimes. I no longer feel like I have to have something on, or be using the TV, or be doing something.
We have dinner at the table every night. And I love hanging out at the breakfast bar while my partner cooks.
It’s been really fascinating to see the easy changes in habits that - quite frankly - we really could have always made, but kind of never realized we should.
I will leave this post here for today, but I hope you really enjoyed reading. I hope you will take part in the above exercise and if you come to any changes or realizations about things you also want to change, let me know :)
As always, thank you so much for being here and reading, and I will see you in next week’s post!! :) <3
Muy interesante todo, realmente si, la mayoría de la gente mira por mirar tv y no solo algo preciso y que le interesa.Yo pase por etapas parecidas en la vida, cuando vivíamos en el pinar casi no miraba tv en todo el día, porque tenía un bebé que criar y estaba atenta siempre a los paseos diarios, los juegos cooking y demás , y cuando tenía un rato para mi si podía me sentaba al aire libre a disfrutar de la naturaleza y el canto de mos diferentes pájaros. Cuando se tiene country life, la vida es diferente. Muy lindo que compartas esos cambios , no todos los que leen lo entenderán pero si lo pensaran.🥰